Wednesday, April 14, 2010

My Baby

It's only 6 weeks old
It's due date is dec. 6th!
Sunday, April 11, 2010

Okay Here We Go Again!

OKay I broke up with Thomas!
I do love him, really I do....I'm just still in love with Ben!
One night when Ben was staying the night at Thomas with me there also,
Ben and Thomas were drinking and so they got drunk.
Thomas was really being immature.
he beat up a bum for no reason
punched holes in his walls
was being rude and mean to Ben and me.
and was saying that he was going to kill myself and alot of crazy stuff!

I do love him but I dont want to and cant be with someone who drinks
and smokes weed as much as he does.

And so while Thomas was doing whatever
Ben was there for me when I would cry and feel like shit!
and he was drunk, but he's a nice drunk!

Well when Bens drunk he has a lot of courage.
So he kissed me!!!

When he kissed me I got all tingly and I fell back in love with him!
the way I felt when he kissed me was indescribable!

I want to be with Ben so bably!
its all that I want but yes, he still loves Savannah too!
And just like last time he loves her more than me!
even though I treat him better, and we would be totally AWESOME together.
But I just Ill just have to wait for that day to come
when he see's just what I'm talking about!

I feel really bad for breaking up with Thomas but I follow my heart 
and my heart tells me that I'm meant to be with Ben!

I'm really really really sorry to Thomas for doing this to him
but I tried to make it work I really did it was just too hard for me to do!

I know Thomas says that he loves me and everything but we've only known eachother for like a month and a half and he doesn't even know everything about me , so how can he really love me...I think it might just be a lot of lust that he's feeling, not love!!!

Okay so I'm really sorry to Thomas, and I'm back on the Ben roller coaster!

great! =/
Tuesday, April 6, 2010

My Life Right Now!

My lifes pretty good right now...
I'm friends with Ben and Sam again..
okay I'm more friends with Ben though, he's like one of my best friends he knows so much about me even though he hurt me ALOT I still care for him
(in a friend way)
Me and Sam are trying to be friends for Thomas my WONDERFUL FIANCEE!
Sam is  like Thomas's brother there BFF's so we're trying to be friends.

I've also been trying to get a job, my life's going to be changing very much in the next couple of months!
I'm going to need to get a job so that I can get a car and so that me and Thomas can get an apartment together.

I have something really big coming soon, I'll say stuff about it on Monday the 18th of April!

About Me

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Shellbee Renee
I'm 17, I love to hangout with my best friend kayluhh! I LUFF YOU KAYLUHH! My life isn't always fun and enjoyable but it's life, I like to hangout and be with my friends it's when I'm the happiest! My love life isn't too great either, I've been in love once and it didn't work out, lol but strangely I'm okay with the out come...I never know what's going to happen or who's going to come along, I'm the kind of person who go's with the flow, I don't like making decisions...So if you ask me to you probably won't get an answer back! hehe I love to make people happy, and I'm fun to be could say I'm the life of the party lol...=P
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